Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Game Playing Boredom

Disclaimer: The "men" I refer to in here is a subset of the male population. "Men" can be defined as "potential suitors". I actually think men in general are not bad people. My experience dictates that potential suitors are distasteful.

I'm tired of chasing what (or is it who?) I want - wait, do I even want that? (or him?) Slow down, take a couple deep breaths, back away from the scene and run the other way.

I'm definitely tired of being chased. Everything just sounds so canned, flat, predictable and typical. Everyone seems so boring, a washed-out clone of the fellow who came before him. Someone please say something original and interesting for once! I don't care how attractive you say you think I am - let me know that you really see me!

I just want a close friend. Someone I could hang out with on the weekends, maybe go to a movie or a museum every once in a while, someone to cuddle with on the couch when we're both feeling lonely. I don't think I could really do well in a "relationship" right now, but it would be nice to have a friend. A real friend who didn't play games or string me along.

Maybe the fellow strings me along because he's bored with me. Huh. There's an idea. I need to stop thinking about him. "I'm busy this week." "I'm busy this week." "I'm busy this week." I haven't told myself that phrase often enough to actually use it when I need to. I see the problem but can't quite implement the solution. Yet.

"I'm too busy taking care of myself that I have no time to devote to being convenient for you."

I just want to weep. Since when did men become so selfish and mean? Since when did I get forced into playing the game?

1 comment:

don said...

Perhaps those you define as men are actually still just boys,.. Think of them as boys and you can view them in a different light.