New Year's Reflections

Where was I a year ago? At my parents' home in Cedar City, UT. I was still determined to become the USMC's top intel officer, the plan of which was completely crushed half-way through 2005. I had no sweetheart to call my own and I was doing fairly crappy in school. Oh, and most importantly, I was a mere three months and 26 days from being fully initated as a Roman Catholic.

And here I am. Still at my parents' home (although hopefully they'll be moving - for real- soon). I'm doing much better in school and I do have a wonderful man I can call "honey". I can say that, for the first time in my adult life, I'm happy with myself and at peace with the world in general. I can also say that there is no recipe for this profound state of being, and I'm still trying to figure out how I got here.

I have a vague idea of what I want to do with my life, career-wise. In August it was work for the NSA. In early October it was "creative" writing or journalism. In late December it's "I have no fucking clue".

My favorite professor told me to do some soul searching during my exile in Utah, and through all my prayers and telling myself to get with the program and "figure it out", nothing.

I still toy with the idea that war corresponding would be fascinating and "fun" work, although I doubt my sweetheart would agree. He's been suspiciously quiet whenever I bring up the idea.

No one ever keeps their New Year's Resolutions. Thus, I've decided to make some goals for Spring Semester 2006, as keeping a goal for 20 weeks (if you count the couple weeks before the semester starts and a couple weeks after it ends) is probably more-doable than keeping a goal for 56. I think I've made some fairly modest goals for this next semester:

1. To earn a 4.0 GPA for this last semester at Montana Tech, which I believe is (barely) doable.
2. To keep my apartment in a relative state of saneness, which may or may not be doable if I'm trying to accomplish goal #1.
3. To get at least 30 minutes of physical activity done a day, which may or may not be doable. Of course, my definition of "physical activity" is fairly broad. And made easier because of Coach Green's Racquetball 101 class. I can also try that walking-to-class thing again, which will put in 40 minutes of "physical activity" in.
   
4. (This ties in with goal #3) To start running again. I want to be running 20 miles a week by June.

I'm not really concerned with the fact my big life-plan has changed dramatically in the past year. "Correct and Redirect" was the advice I found in January's issue of Runner's World, as applied to running programs. I know my life has changed dramatically in the past couple of years, and that it's probably going to change dramatically in the next year (nay, in the next six months!). I think I have the "correcting" part of the advice down, because life as I know it has intensely improved over the past year. It's the "redirecting" I need to get.

It Is Done, and Some Gripes

So the hair got permed today. I had a nice student hairdresser at the local hairstyling college, and they were playing Johnny Cash in the salon so it was a fairly pleasant experience considering I was sitting with my hair soaked in chemicals, the smell of which follows you around for the next three days.

Mom is very happy with the result, and is insistant that my boyfriend will be as delighted with my now-curly hair. So if two people are happy with it, I can't complain. I haven't decided if I like the curls or not. At the very least, they'll make getting ready in the morning that much faster; just throw in some curl-defining stuff, toss the curls around and go.

I do think the curls make my face look softer and more feminine, which might make it easier for the idiots in Utah who tend to find it ambiguous in determining my gender. I blame this on me not fitting the cookie-cutter Utah women are "supposed" to be molded from more than anything else.

Anyway, sidestepping the issues I have with the theocratic state and its devout citizens, the news here sucks. I'd much rather read, on FoxNews.com, about a kid who singlehandedly went to Iraq for the holidays as an experiment in imbedded journalism (because that's actually kind of cool he survived) rather than watch the news here. As "top" stories, I've watched packages on:

• a followup to some boy scout getting stabbed in the head with his scoutmaster's knife (this wasn't even news, as the kid was completely healed and all they had in the package was how he got stabbed with the Leatherman)
• a followup to a Utah State van crash where some students died five months ago. Not really any news here either, just an interview of a survivor disputing the forensic evidence on seatbelt use.
• The 200th anniversary of Joe Smith's birth. I won't even touch this one.
• A dog ran 100 "show" sheep onto some train tracks, where they were slaughtered by a train. The dog (of course) was shot. Don't get me started with this one either.
  
• Mischevious teens deflating those huge Christmas decorations. This, I think, actually qualifies as news, even though I doubt I would ever see a similar package from KXLF.

Et cetera, et cetera. I won't mention how they used two very similar-looking anchors the other night that seemed reminiscent of The Stepford Wives. Because of the quality newscasting I've seen here (the "Fresh Air" Forecast is borderline silly), I've given up getting my news from the local station.
Arg. I want to go home.

I Wonder As I Wander

In between the great Christmas wrap-up and the huge New Year's hoop-la, my mother wielded her great matronly force into getting my hair permed. Turns out she liked how my hair was done for my best friend's wedding so much she wanted it permanent. And, as it always seems to turn out when I visit my parents, I have very little say (if any) on the matter.
I suppose if mom wants to spend the money I should let her. The chemical burning happens tomorrow morning, when it's too early for me to really complain about anything except lack of sleep.
I ran into an old school pal today. This girl, she was one of those bright figure-out-the-structure-of-DNA types. She got married either her freshman or sophomore year in college, and dropped out of college to have babies. I'm not quite sure why this is so depressing to me. Perhaps because I'm of the mind that everyone THAT brilliant should at least finish college. Even if your major ends up being Underwater Basket Weaving or something similarly non-productive.
To limit my exposure to the locals (and retain the little bit of sanity I have left), I've been putting all my favorite recipes in one of those blank books I'm so fond of buying. Now, when I want to impress The Honey and make Toscana soup followed by Fettuccine with Mushrooms & Prosciutto and finish with Classic Tiramisu (from the recipe of a true Italian chef, from the old country), I have all the recipes in one little notebook. Now I just need to muster the energy and ingredients to make all that stuff.
I miss home so much. I've got big plans when my roommate moves all her furniture out and I can move all my new stuff (stolen from the parents, of course) in. I have no idea why I'm so excited to have my own little apartment without roommates, but it's a thrilling prospect.

Now I Remember

The next time someone asks me why I dislike Utah so much, I can just relate to them what happened today.
It was a windy afternoon, with a little rain and a dusting of snow. Because of this "severe weather", the power goes out. For five hours.
Someone please either update my definition of "severe weather", which is probably closer to what Butte, Montana defines "severe weather" as, or explain to me why the power in Southern Utah goes out whenever the weather gods sneeze in Utah's general direction.

I do believe, in all my young years spent in Butte, the power was out once. For a short time. And I think that Butte's weather is much more "severe" than anything Cedar City, Utah has experienced. They should invite Utah Power stockholders to go up to Butte during a snowstorm or arctic chill when temperatures drop to -30 or so.

That is some severe weather.

Creepy Perverts Revisited

Tonight I got a text message from Curt, of drunken "do you want to come over and cuddle" fame. This makes me wonder why I ever gave him my phone number to begin with. Oh, I remember. He was nice to me and bought a drink for me at the Vu once. Before he turned creepy.

It said, "Merry Christmas sexy. Curt".

For the record, I did text him back wishing him a Blessed Christmas and Joyous New Year, because not returning a holiday greeting is just unkind in my book. Maybe I've encouraged his creepiness to continue, although I hope not.

But if he continues with the creepy act when I return to Butte, he will be in for a shock when he finds out that, not only will I not put up with it, I'm going to be "actively hostile" about not putting up with it.

You're Getting Old When The Friends Start Dying Off

I just found out today an old friend of mine from high school committed suicide this January, which sucks the ass of the flea on the camel's back.
He was a good guy; a nuclear missle technician for the Navy. He was stationed at Kings Bay, Georgia, on the USS Arizona. Definitely the most funny kid I've ever met. What makes this even more depressing is I thought he was one of the few people I went to high school with who was worth a damn.
They buried him at the cemetary in Cedar. So I suppose on Monday I'll stop by and pay him a visit.

No wonder he hasn't been returning my e-mails.

The Ups and Downs of Being Back in Utah

I made it. That's all that we can really say happened.
The flights went smoothly, and other than a 5 hour layover in Salt Lake City I have nothing to complain about.

But, the best thing is that grades are up on Orediggerweb. I earned 'A's in Literature of Decadence and British Literature (my Decadence prof almost never gives out 'A's and I crapped out on the British Literature final), which was a pleasant surprise. I earned an 'A' in my Intermediate Writing course, which was to be expected. And I earned a 'C' in my I&C course, which I'm insanely happy with. The I&C gods have been appeased.

You may think that a 'C' isn't that great, but you weren't there; you didn't take the course! I'm just happy that, if all goes well, I'll be all set to graduate in May.

My parents also decided to drive back to Utah today, but they haven't made it home just yet. I appreciate their effort to see me when I'm here.

And. . . it was reported to me that the current temperature in Cedar City is 52 degrees. Very balmy compared to the -20s that it was in Butte this past weekend. Break out the short shorts and the skirts!

Give me a few days here and I promise I will be back to my cynical, grumpy self that emerges whenever I have an extended stay in Utah.

One Party After Another

All right. I finally got my best friend married off (for those keeping track, I've now successfully married off my best friends from both high school and college). Janice had a most beautiful wedding ceremony/reception/party. Notice the boobalicious dresses. Even on the lowly endowed, you can create the illusion of mega breasts.This is me at the reception with the coolest math professor ever and his wife.
Sidenote: It's great to have the internet connection back. I like spending money every month on Network Services that don't provide a stable network. Makes me feel like the dollars are going to good use.

Appeasing the I&C Gods

It is finished.

The test was "supposed" to be multiple-choice. It wasn't.

The test was "supposed" to take an hour and a half to complete. I took 45 minutes.

I've been subsisting on caffiene and various junk foods for the past 72 hours. Sleep? What's that? I was up at 6:00 this morning. I don't want to know what time I finally fell asleep last night. I just hope these minor sacrifices to the I&C Gods have appeased them enough to escape from Tech in May.

Now that I'm sleepy, hungry, and mentally drained, who needs a drink? It's 5:00 somewhere.

The Thing About Underwear

Not all Victoria's Secret stores are made equal. In fact, depending on the time of the year you visit one of these stores, not all Victoria's Secret shopping experiences are made equal.

During the semi-annual sale, avoid Victoria's Secret at all costs. Otherwise you risk seeing women scrounging through bins marked from "32A" to "38D" in a manner reminiscent of hungry heifers. Not a pretty sight. Also, I don't know about you, but I would not like to guess how many other women touched the bra I just purchased.

No matter how long it's been since you've had a fitting, a saleswomen would more than likely want to see if you're wearing the correct size. This helps you to both justify the size you currently wear as well as to allow the saleswoman to hook you into spending your life savings on a lingerie wardrobe. Sidenote: Personally, I have yet to meet a rude Victoria's Secret saleswoman, and I think they must secretly clone or brainwash these ladies into the perfect weapon to peddle the pretty-nothings.

If your boyfriend is brave enough to venture into the hot-pink Estrogen Bubble with you, it's OK if he doesn't have anything to say when you leave, and it's totally awesome if he offers to hold the metallic hot-pink shopping bag for you. This, my readers, is what is called "Love". (It's called "Love plus plus" if that shopping bag is the extra huge one. We've all seen it; it's the one the size of a large dog.)

If you shop their store online, the selection is not as good as the selection in the physical store. The exception is if you're buying something plain Jane for "every day". Then, the plain articles from their Very Sexy, Body by Victoria, Angel, and Signature Cotton lines are fine.

In shopping online or from the mail-order catalog, you run the risk of getting bombarded by pink catalogs every two weeks for the next three years, as well as receiving extra Christmas and Valentine's Day catalogs.

The clothes that Victoria's Secret makes for sleeping are unparalleled. I highly recommend anything from their signature line. A close second is the flannel stuff they make for winter. Very warm and comfy.

IPEX may be patent-pending, but it sure does work.

The Decadent Turn of the Screw

I actually have an idea why the procrastination regarding my Decadence paper has extended to extreme limits. I think, somewhere in the semester, between "Torture Garden" and "Monsieur de Phocas", I lost my taste for reading the stuff. I blame most of this on "Torture Garden", not necessarily because it is a bad book, but because it was much too graphic for me to read, and I read it anyway. And there was definitely no way I was going to read "The Damned", because as fascinating as some guy obessessed with the Black Mass is, I don't think that's what I should be pouring into my head.

Now I'm scarred for life. If you don't have a taste for reading descriptions of post-tortured people, if you don't like reading a torturer's lament on his "lost art", please don't run out and pick up a copy of the book today. You can have mine. Seriously.

On the End of the Semester and Being a Bad Bridesmaid

I've finally recovered from my wallet & phone theft. I received my new/real driver's license (as opposed to the green paper one) in the mail, as well as my new credit card. Other than my Barnes & Noble Member card, I think I have my wallet back to where it should be.
I think I've had enough of this subzero weather. Either that, or the end of semester has killed my motivation to do anything productive (besides bitch on my blog, but I wouldn't count that as being productive). All I want to do is sleep, and eat, and sleep some more. Not exactly the best thing to do when you have an eight page paper due Friday. Oh well. It will get done, and it will be praiseworthy. That's all I can really say. At least I can be looking forward to a toasty 22 degrees Monday.
Word on the street is that I'll only get $5 back for my British Literature text. While depressing, the book has been tainted with the evil stench of that class and I'd rather have the $5 to buy a cup of coffee or something. Too bad I won't have enough cash to buy a copy of Beowulf like I planned. At least I finished the class without killing/maiming anyone or myself.
My roommate has been eagerly prepping for her wedding next Friday. I believe I'm starting to get excited about it, because it will be a gorgeous event (and a reason for me to dress up!). This will be my first go as a bridesmaid, and Janice had the good taste to pick out some pretty dresses. Amusing to me, the dress is cut so as to create major cleavage, even on a non-busty femme fatale such as myself. When I tried on the dress, Janice zipped me up, and then we both bust out laughing when we saw how I looked in the mirror. This dress will require a trip to Bozeman this weekend to pick out. . .more appropriate undergarments at one of my two favorite stores in the mall there.
I'm afraid I haven't been the best bridesmaid. Janice and I have somewhat different tastes when it comes to "stuff", and I haven't been very vocal on much of anything, because I'd rather she have a wedding gala that catered to her personality rather than my own. I'm willing to help out, but usually when she asks my opinion on something, I don't have much of an answer for her. Sometimes I can clarify something for a vendor when she asks what Janice wants and Janice doesn't have an answer. ("Yes, she wants an antique-look, and colors such as brown, cream, pink and green would be much appreciated.") But other than my few-and-far-between epiphanies, when I'm asked a question regarding her wedding all I can do is give a blank stare and say, "Que?".

Amusing Things

I amuse the gal who peddles my skin care products because apparently, I'm willing to go out in public in anything from glasses and sweats to going-out-glam-diva. (Your pure randomness of the day, from me to you)

I'm glad classes are officially over. I woke up at six this morning to work on my research paper, and stopped by the SUB (Student Union Building) to grab a "breakfast sandwich". Anyway, the cashier knew me from back in the daze when I was seeing my ex-fiance, Kris, and she asked how I was doing. I said I was doing fine, and that I was seeing someone new.
"Oh that's great. You know, I always thought Kris wasn't good enough for you." (This is news to me)
"Really?"
"Yeah, I always thought he was a little self-centered." (We laugh)
"Well, that's one way of putting it."

I'm puzzled why I'm still associated with this other fellow. I shouldn't be surprised at all; my cousin is still associated with the girl he used to date here, and that was over 10 years ago.

Why I DON'T Have a Webcam

Also known as: What Diane watches on repeat when she's avoiding her British Literature final. Who said all-nighters can't be fun?

Numa Numa

Need I say anything more? Find more info at the wikipedia article.

I Need To Get More Girlfriends

Not that there's anything wrong with my guy friends, but let me illustrate:

I have two very good friends, who happen to be guys and happen to also be brothers. A typical night involves me going to their apartment so I can watch T.V.
Tonight, I found out why men have nipples (because if women went around twisting each others' nipples, that would just be weird. It's funny if men do it) and one of my friends put a glove on his head and pretended to be a deer. (Or reindeer, or elk, or whatever) Let's not forget the vast amount of sexual, sacrilegious jokes that get passed around as well.

I asked my other friend for advice on what I should wear to this party I'm going to tonight (because I honestly tried to dream up something appropriate and couldn't). When a girl has to ask a guy for advice on what to wear, something is wrong.

Don't get me wrong, my guy friends are funny, great people to hang out with.

But they're also the reason why I'm seriously twisted.

Top Ten Movies I Want To See This Winter

Aeon Flux: Charlize Theron in a sci-fi. Do I need to say anything else?
Good Night and Good Luck: Black and White movies rock. And I like political thrillers.
Memoirs of a Geisha: Yes, it will suck ass. (Being a bastardization of a bastardization of Japanese culture) But I'm all about Gong Li and beautiful cinematography.
Syriana: I'm also all about the seedy life of a field CIA agent.
The Chronicles of Narnia: the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe: I'm a sucker for nerdy book adaptations. And I refuse to see anything else Peter Jackson makes (Kong, this winter) except for the extended editions of the Lord of the Rings trilogies. And even those were fucked up.
Corpse Bride: I love Tim Burton movies too. I wanted to see this when it was out in theaters, but never made it. Guess I'll have to hope for an early DVD release.
The Ice Harvest: Dark comedy with John Cusack AND Connie Neilsen? Too cool.
The New World: With eye-candy like Christian Bale and Colin Farrell. And it looks semi-accurate.
The Interpreter: Yeah, so I rented it already. But we were sleepy and it was being intelligent so we turned it off. Besides, I don't know how you can successfully followup The Nightmare Before Christmas.
Chinatown: Is it my fault there's crap in theaters? Besides, I've never seen it before, and I've heard it's good. I never said they had to be NEW movies.