Something Profound

I need new running shoes. I suspected I needed new shoes earlier this week but last night definitely decided that was the cause of the leg pain I've been dealing with for the past week. Especially when I woke up this morning and my legs definitely didn't want me walking anywhere. I never really liked the shoes I was running in but really noticed last night that my feet were slipping around in them. I'm definitely going to yoga next week.

Wandering around the Runner's World website, I found something profound that I could (maybe) apply to Life in general. I'm all about that.

"There are plenty of great books and training programs out there, but the truth of being a runner comes in finding out for yourself, by yourself, who you are as a runner. It also means understanding that the runner you were yesterday is not the runner you are today. And most of us can barely imagine the runner we'll be tomorrow."

Where am I running to? I honestly don't know, and that's kind of scary. I haven't yet gotten to the point where I can reflect on my life when I'm running. If I focus on anything else besides staying relaxed, telling myself how easy it is to run for 23 consecutive minutes, I slow down and want to stop.

In Life, you can't stop. I guess you can, but then you definitely won't be going anywhere and when you wake up days, months, years later you'll be kicking yourself. Sometimes I want to stop in Life; I definitely think I've lost my focus and whatever post-college momentum I might have had. I'm afraid of trying new things even though I thrive on new experiences.

I can't run back . . . I can't say, "Sorry, I left my sense of indomitability back on that steep hill at Year 22 and my crushed, demoralized heart at Year 24. Is there a shuttle I can take to go back and retrieve those?"

Maybe I can hope that I'll drop my severe insecurity at Year 25 and pick up a sense of peace by Year 30. Hopefully I can find some Self-Respect somewhere in there.