Blank Books

I have this thing, where I buy blank books/journals/whatever, with every intention of putting writing in them.

Except I don't. I have a collection of pretty books deviod of ink or graphite markings.

If I ever do write in them, I'll fill three or four pages at the most and then end up tossing the book because I can never seem to pick up where I've left off. There's an exception to this, which is a book that documents almost every detail of one of my failed relationships. I have to hang on to that book because there's some sentimental value that would disappear forever if I tossed the book. Why I want to hang on to such heartbreaking emotions is beyond me.

One of these days I'll travel or start writing seriously or do something that will warrent a collection of pretty books to write in. Then I will already have the pretty books, and need spend no extra dollars in aquiring them.

Yeah, right.

What I should do is buy a bunch of different Magnetic Poetry sets and make my friends dream up all sorts of things so I can put them in odd places in my pretty books so when I do write in them, I'll be guaranteed to find something that will make me smile. I gave a friend the "Sexual Innuendo" Magnetic Poetry set, because I knew that with his mind and that collection of words, priceless musings would emerge. I visited my friend some time after he had the set, and this is what I found on his fridge:

"Woman I'd like your delicious tuna pudding on my jumbo cream full pussy plow"

And I thought that would be the perfect thing to say to a woman to get her to leave you alone. I'm inspired now to find the perfect thing to say to a man to get him to leave me alone. I could say something similar to what my friend dreamed up above, but knowing my luck in Butte, that strategy would backfire.

One of the most heinous books I'd ever read is "Memoirs of a Geisha", by Arthur Golden. So they're making a movie of it, which will be the butcher of a book that butchered Japanese culture and society. But all of my favorite Chinese actresses are in it, and I saw a preview, and it looks marvelous. So now I have to justify coughing up the $7 to see my favorite actresses in a movie that will be so Americanized, I'll have to not watch half the movie just to enjoy it. But who knows? Maybe I'll like the movie, even though the source material leaves more than a lot to be desired.

And then I can write about the experience in a blank book.